bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
