I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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