This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
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I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
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I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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