butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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