Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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