I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
