When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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