Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
