The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
