i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
