Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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