Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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