I wish i was in the wii world.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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