too bad you live with your parents still
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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