So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
