just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
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