After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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