I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
