Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I wish i was in the wii world.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
