One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
