she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
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