i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Life is so much better after having sex.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I love you. Go after that dick
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
