Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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