dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
