I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
