i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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