You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
it's like iHOP with fire
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I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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