You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
