I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
