he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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