In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
