took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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