Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
