my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
