It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize