I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
