why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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