Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
you would pick up someone in the library
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
