I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize