My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize