"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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