Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much Jack, so little girl.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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