oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
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I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
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So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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