i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
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im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
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we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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