Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
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