He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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