You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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