Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed