the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize