Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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