There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Randomize
